It has been drilled into us that vulnerability is a bad thing and that we should avoid it. We live in a society where it is expected of us to be strong and without weakness. We ignore our vulnerability and are ashamed of what we can’t do.
The idea that vulnerability is weakness is holding us back. Our vulnerabilities make us human. We learn more about who we are when we sit down and consider what makes us vulnerable and why. It is completely natural to feel vulnerable, when you use it to your advantage it allows you to achieve more. Use that vulnerability as motivation to be the best you that you can be. Don’t be ashamed of who you are, embrace it.
Brené Brown The Power Of Vulnerability – TedTalks
In this video by TED.com Brené Brown talks about what she discovered in her research about shame, vulnerability and the power that they can create. The research she has done into vulnerability has helped many people realize that vulnerability is a part of life that you can’t control. There are people in the world that have realized this and took advantage of what they believe they are vulnerable to. Understanding yourself allows you to share who you are with other people. When you can share yourself with others you make connections that will change your life.
The moment that you realize that life doesn’t have to be black and white you take your first step towards living a more successful and fulfilled life. When you allow yourself to be vulnerable you will open yourself up to being more creative, more loved and more joyous. Take advantage of who you are and what makes you feel vulnerability
Take Advantage Of Being Vulnerable
Your vulnerabilities are part of who you are start taking advantage of what makes you uncomfortable. Embracing them gives you a chance to understand yourself better. You can take advantage of your vulnerabilities by having the courage to fight passed how they make you feel. When you control the way you feel you are able to see clearly and move towards your goals faster.
Controlling your vulnerabilities allows you to take change your life in the most positive ways. Take some time and find out what really scares you, what you’re ashamed of and what makes you feel vulnerable. Knowing is half the battle. Once you have an idea of what makes you feel vulnerable use those feelings to grow who you are into who you want to be. Sometimes the things that scare you the most are the things that will push you the hardest. Always push yourself to achieve what you think you deserve. Life is about achieving creating what’s best for you, do what you need to do to achieve your dreams.
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The law of averages is the idea that over time everything will eventually work its way to equilibrium. When you think about it that means everything around you is becoming more average. This concept is really important when you think about who you spend your time with. Are your friends and family struggling to get by or are they successful? Depending on how you answered that question you should be able to reflect on what they’re doing and see how things are most likely going to be for you.
It’s important to understand that just because your friends and family act a certain doesn’t mean you have to do the same thing. It only takes one person to change your life. One person make a positive impact on you that pushes you in the right direction. Look at the people you spend your time with and ask yourself “Do I want to be like these people?” if the answer is “Yes” then you’re doing something right. If you answered “No” then it’s time we look at how the people around you impact your life.
How People Influence You
There are many ways that the people around you influence your life. Peer pressure is a really difficult thing to work around. If your friends and family are making certain choices it’s more likely that you will too. It’s hard to go against what the social norms are when it comes to your group. You can become an outcast and we are programmed to avoid becoming an outcast. What you need to remember is the choices you make can only truly affect you. Don’t let the choices of other influence you into doing something that doesn’t improve your life.
The more time you spend with successful people the more you will realize that success comes from the choices you make. If your friends are saving 10% of their income it is more likely that you will too. Start small and find one person that is a good influence on your life. Find someone that has the same goals, aspirations, and dreams as you. This person should be more experienced than you and can help you out. It only takes one person to change your life. Remember that your net worth will be based on your network.
Law of Averages
The law of averages is an important thing to understand. In the most basic form it states that over time things will become more similar. Earlier I mentioned that it means we reach an equilibrium. Both of these ideas are true. The law of averages can really make a difference in your life because you become like your friends. If your friends are successful you will be successful. If you friends watch every new movie you are more likely to watch every new movie.
Life likes to balance itself out. That means if you want to balance out higher or become above average you are going to need to do above average things. One of those above average things you can do is create a network of successful people to spend time with. If you surround yourself with success you will eventually become successful. This happens through a process of mimicry. Find the people that have successful habits and follow in their footsteps. Some of the habits will be difficult but others will happen naturally without you know. Remember it’s easier to change things one step at a time. Don’t go big and give up. Start small and pyramid your success into bigger success.
Help Others Achieve More
One way to help build your network is to help others. Now that you’re in the mindset of looking for successful people to help you, get out there and help others. Giving to others is one of the best ways to have others give to you. You don’t need to be the best at something to help someone learn. In reality you only need to be one step ahead of the person you’re teaching. Do what you can to help others and add value to their lives and it will not only grow your network but it will make you feel good about yourself. Feeling good about yourself is one step towards becoming more successful. You’re also building that network so you’re killing two birds with one stone!
No One Achieves Success Alone
Contrary to what most people believe success isn’t about being self made. Success is about surrounding yourself with people that can help you achieve more. The people you surround yourself with are everything. At any point in time someone you know may bring you the opportunity that changes your life. Don’t forget that you may be the person in someone else’s life that changes their whole world. Be social but know that you need to look for people that aspire to bigger things than what they have today. There is nothing wrong with big dreams!
Let’s Get Started
It’s time to get serious about your network and who you spend your time with. Here are 6 steps to improve your network so you can achieve more.
Write down 3 traits of the person you want to become.
Create a list with the 5 people you spend most of your time around.
Write down the 3 most common traits of each person.
Compare these 15 traits to the traits you want to have. If the traits don’t match decide if this person is helping you or hurting your dreams of becoming successful. If they are hurting your dreams mark them off. This doesn’t mean you have to drop all contact with them it just means that you are more knowledgeable about the situation.
Now it’s time to find replacements for the people that you have marked off. This doesn’t need to happen quickly. Some great places to find successful people are Toastmasters meetings, Real Estate Investment Associations, networking events, or events related to you hobbies. It is easy to find these groups using the Meetup app.
Now that you are working on growing your network, share this idea with other people that you think will benefit from meeting new people. You can never know too many people and you can never help too much.
Don’t forget that no one succeeds alone. The people around you are going to make all the difference. Find the best and eventually you will be the best!
