Forming Keystone Habits Is The Start Of A Better Life!

Keystone habits are not talked about as much as they should be. They are the habits that hold everything together. Keystone habits are named after a keystone in construction, which is a stone that holds an arch together. So what I’m getting at is getting keystone habits created will improve other habits.

Why Should You Care About Habits?

You may be wondering why it matters if you have a keystone habit and that’s fair. It is important to have keystone habits because they are something to build on. One example of a good keystone habit is working out. When you first start working out things are difficult but over time they improve. If you want to continue to see progress you may need to change your diet. If you smoke it may also get you to quick because of the difficult breathing.

A few more examples of common keystone habits would be reading, writing a journal, making your bed, or eating dinner with family. If you look at each one you’ll notice how they build up new habits. If you are in the process of forming a good habit consider that your keystone habit and build off of it. Just because it works for one person doesn’t mean it will work for you but creating great habits should always be one of your goals. 

Reading

If you read often you will have a more worldly perspective leading to new habits. Reading can also teach you about new habits or concepts that you’ve never heard of before. 

Journaling

Writing a journal will make you think about your day, you’ll see places for improvement and want to make the change. 

Making Your Bed

Making your bed starts your day off with something you can say you finished. You will want to keep checking things off your “to do” lists. It’s the easiest way to start the day of with an accomplishment.

Dinner with Family

If you start eating dinner with your family you will want to get more involved in everyone’s lives. You will grow new habits together.

As you can see changing one aspect of your life can make a big difference. Have you ever wondered what your life would be like if you started to read more? What about going and using that gym membership you’ve been paying for? One new habit that sticks will change your life everyday. 

How Do You Develop New Habits? 

The sad truth about habits is that there is no cookie cutter formula for habit creation. Scientists have put an incredible amount of effort into studying habits but everyone is different. That means that everyone will have different results when forming a habit.

On the bright side we do know that being systematic about habits will help in forming them. You shouldn’t worry about how long a habit takes to form. What is more important is making sure you continue practicing the habit. The repetition is what builds the habit.

Systematizing Your Habits

As mentioned before a habit is formed by being systematic. There are three common parts to a habit and each is just as important as the lost. They are known as the the cue, the routine, and the reward. Charles Duhigg can be credited for putting the parts of a habit into such a simple concept. He explains them really well in his book “The Power of Habit: Why We Do What We Do in Life and Business”.

The Cue 

The cue or trigger is the thing that sets off the habit. This can be a time, a place, other people, your emotions, or a reaction to an event. When the cue happens this is when you start your routine.

The Routine

The routine is the habit itself. It is the action that you do without thinking about it. This can be anything from going to the kitchen to grab a treat or going out to smoke. Once the routine gets going it is hard to stop and may feel automatic. Without the routine something feels off about a situation and it can ruin your day.

 The Reward

The whole reason the habit exists is to get the reward. In most cases it will be related to dopamine. Dopamine is a chemical in your head that gives you pleasure or joy from a situation. Once you have finished your routine your brain will tell you you did a good job and reward you.

The Plan

Now that you understand these three principles it’s time to make a plan.  If this is a new habit you will have to create a cue, for an old habit you will be identifying. The next thing will be the routine. The routine is the action of the habit, if it is a new habit decide what the routine is but make it small. Small habits are easier to form than big ones. If you have a habit it’s time to change it. If you change the cue and the routine to something positive the reward will still come.

Take some time and write out either what your new habit will be or what you want to work on. Keep a notebook around as you build your habit and document how things feel. The beginning is the hardest time. As you spend more time on your habit it will feel easier every day.

How do you choose a new habit?

Choosing a new habit can be difficult. The easiest way to get started is to look at what will benefit your life the most. If you feel like you could lose some weight look into starting a habit of exercising. This doesn’t mean buying supplements, getting a gym membership, and a personal trainer. Make it simple like doing pushups before or after work. A great app for this is the 7 Minute Workout. It’s easy to do and doesn’t take much time. If you feel like reading suits you better take a look at getting ebooks on your phone. You can always read a few paragraphs instead of checking social media.

What really matters when picking a habit is picking one that suits your life. If you try to jump into something that you don’t care about it will be much harder to do. The easiest habits to form are the ones that you enjoy doing.

Sticking With Your New Habit

There are four things to keep in mind when forming habits.

1. It’s not going to be easy.
2. You are going to have to self motivated because this is about you.
3. You will have to show discipline.
4. Delayed gratification is key.

These 4 concepts may sound challenging but they really aren’t. It is much easier actually get out there and do something than think about it. If you sit around thinking too much you will overhype how hard it will be. Motivate yourself to get out and do what you want, use the 3 parts of a habit to break it down. Know that it will take some time but it will pay off in the long run. If you stick to your habits in the end you will have a happier life.

Habits Change Your Life

It is pretty obvious that habits can change a life. All of us know at least one person that smokes too often or drinks to often. Those are habits that formed from doing the activity regularly. Spending the time to create a good habit can have positive impacts in all aspects of your life.

As long as you are picking healthy habits to form there is no wrong way to do it. If you pick exercising eventually you will start eating healthier. If you start reading more often you may start to write more often or get into new hobbies you didn’t know existed. The people around you will also be inspired by what you are doing.

It is important to remember that you are living your life for you. Forming habits makes life easier you can go on autopilot and still do great things. If you are ready to go out and start building new keystone habits make sure you like this post, share on social media and sign up for our newsletter. If you’re really feeling confident about your habit tell us about it in the comments!

Fear, The Great Motivator

Fear as motivation isn’t something you hear about often. Sometimes you will hear people say to face your fears. Most of the time people just try to avoid being scared. This is a problem because when you are pushing yourself you are going to be scared. This is completely normal. You shouldn’t hold yourself back because of an idea. Take action and use fear as motivation!

Why Fear is a Great Motivator 

Using fear to motivate yourself makes sense because it is a natural response to danger. At one point in human history we used fear as a way to keep ourselves from being injured or potentially killed. That’s not the same as modern times. Most of the things people are fearful of won’t actually cause any problems. If you look at the most common phobias (heights, spiders, and snakes), most of them won’t actually hurt you. Yes in very specific circumstances they can but it is unlikely. So when you are thinking of fears you should think of them as a way to push yourself to new limits.

Fear is Something That Can Either Push You or Hold You Back

When you are fearful of something you have 2 choices. You can embrace the fear and push forward or you can continue to be scared and hold yourself back. It is a mental game and I know which side I’m going to choose, what about you? Pushing yourself with fear will give you a chance to grow as a person. You’ll have the opportunity have new experiences that will create new ideas. Going outside of your comfort zone is the only way you will ever achieve more than average. Don’t let yourself fall prisoner to an average lifestyle!

Look at The Success of Others

Success comes to those who are willing to push the limits of what they believe is possible. The most successful people in the world have been fearful of something. Look at what they have achieved and know that it is possible for you to do the same. One of the best ways to learn about the fears and success of other is reading biographies. A biography is like a mini mentor that will help push you to the next level. Many people back down from fear before they should because they don’t want to fail. You must push through that fear just like all of the successful people before you!

Fear of Failure

People are scared of failure because we are taught from a young age that failure is bad. The problem with that is failure is one of the best ways to learn. If you look at babies they learn how to walk by failing. The stand up and then fall until they eventually learn to balance and quit falling. Over time learning from failure gives you a chance to turn failure into success. Failure gives you a chance to develop skills that would have been missed if you immediately become successful (not that this is bad but it’s uncommon. If you can push past the fear of failure you expand your comfort zone. Once you realize your comfort zone is larger than you originally thought you have already taken the first step towards success.

Fear of Success 

Success is a weird thing. Depending on who you ask you will get a different definition. What matters most is that you define your own success. This is where people get scared of success. It is hard to be successful when you compare yourself to others. The success someone else has may scare you and make you think you can’t achieve more. This is untrue. Don’t let peer pressure and the belief that the success someone else achieved is the only right way.

Success is what you make it. Your success may be having more friends or earning more money or maybe spending more time with your family. No matter what you choose, push yourself as hard as possible to achieve your goals. The scariest part of success is that you don’t know what it feels like until you have achieved it. The fear of success is really just the fear of failing to achieve your goals. Don’t let fear decide how successful you can be!

Success Comes to Those Willing to Face Their Fears

No matter what you do the next step will always cause you to be fearful of something. Don’t let this fear hold you back. You are living your life for you and you can push yourself to do anything you set your mind to. You’re the only limiting factor in your life. If you struggle with pushing yourself, you may want to find a friend or family member that will be your accountability partner. Someone that is there to push you when you’re scared to push yourself. It’s time to face your fears!

To help you get started on facing your fears we want to you find 1 thing that you are scared of and write it down. Next you should make a list of 5 reasons why you are scared. Then you will want to write down at least 5 reasons why facing your fears will make your life better. Share this list with your partner and let them work through why facing your fears will benefit your life with you. Your partner should ask “What’s the worst that can happen?” this question will open you up to the fact that most of the worst case scenarios aren’t that bad.  Last you will want to get out there and use your fear as motivation!

If you have any trouble finding an accountability partner feel free to contact us. We’re always happy to help someone achieve more!